Fear of Failing Sucks
Updated: Feb 28, 2020
Fear Sucks! If there is anything stopping me from doing what I know I should, it is fear. I had an extremely hard time trying to decide if I truly wanted to start Lyon Media. Truth is, I was afraid of failing. I was afraid I would start it and it wouldn't work out. I was afraid of what other people would think of my work. Putting myself out there was hard and honestly, sometimes, it still is. However, fear is relative. We each have a different definition of fear. We have different belief systems, values, and even different definitions of success which shape our idea of failure.
There are certain root causes to fear of failing. It may be that as a child you had very unsupportive parents that didn’t encourage you. They didn’t allow you to be a child. They didn’t tell you they were proud of you or help you improve a skill. They just didn’t care. Or, perhaps they cared too much and were involved in every area of your life. They were controlling and when you made a mistake you didn’t have the ability to share that with them. When they found out they handled it poorly and overreacted. This environment is an incubator for fear to grow in a child.
Another root cause could be you have been routinely humiliated. You’re afraid to mess up because you’ll be embarrassed. You fear failure because when you failed you had a sibling that relentlessly teased you, parents that called you stupid or were derogatory, or perhaps even kids at school. Shame breeds fear.
The last root of fear of failure is going through a traumatic event. It could be anything that really put an impression in your mind. Traumatic events put thoughts in your mind that may not be true. They cause insecurity and shame, making you believe that what happened to you is your fault. Fear of failing can result from this. You don’t want to fail and insecurity is telling you you will fail.
Fear of failure manifests itself in the following ways: You have a reluctance to try new things, you self sabotage such as procrastinating, having excessive anxiety, and failure to follow through with your goals. It also manifests through low self esteem and perfectionism. Now that we have established what the root causes and surface issues are of fear of failure, let's discuss how we can fight this fear and find victory over fearing failure!
How to Fight Fear of Failure 101
Stoic Philosophy | The Sphere of Choice
